Sometimes Experts Are the Worst Explainers

Dad goes to jury duty. I attempt to explain jury duty to my 6- and 4-year-old:

I. Anglo-American Theories of Truth vs. Continental Theories of Truth and Its Implications for Common and Civil Law Systems with Specific Reference to Juries
II. Important Civic Duties and Why They Matter to Democracy
III. The Difference between Sixth and Seventh Amendment Rights to a Jury
IV. "Okay So What If You Were a Robber ..."
V. Where Jury Rosters Come From and How Local Government Administers Them and Why This Is a County Function Not a City Function
VI. A Brief History of the Development of Twelve-Man Juries with Digressions into Early Medieval Danish Invasions of England
VII. Stop Hitting Your Brother, I Said Robber not Assaulter
VIII. Citizen Juries as a Check on the Coercive Power of the State
IX. Empirical Research on the Effectiveness of Juries from the Arizona Jury Project
X. Why It Is Okay for Mommy to Be Judge and Jury but not the Government
XI. Look There Is A Thing Called Jury Duty and Daddy Is at It as Is His Civic Duty
XII. I Feel Like This Conversation Was a Bad Idea, Do You Want to Go to Costco?